Other People’s Kids (aka OPKs)


I like kids, but every time I see them screaming at their mom in the parking lot, my reproductive organs shrivel up a bit more. Most people think their own children are lovely, entertaining, and just the cutest things that ever walked the face of the earth. It’s “other people’s kids” that are taking the store down with them. It’s “other people’s kids” that can’t help but squirm, kick seats, and run up and down the aisles during movies. Sometimes parents don’t know when their kid is the child star of every adult’s nightmares. Answer these questions (honestly) to find out if you’re raising an OPK:

*Have you ever had to leave a public place because your child was embarrassing you by throwing a temper tantrum?

*Have other adults given you and your child THE LOOK (ya know, the head shake and disapproving stare)? Does the area around you and your child seem to magically clear out after you two arrive?

*Have you ever had to bribe or convince your child to behave (especially in public)?

*Have you ever had to pay for something in a store that you didn’t want to buy because your child damaged it?

*Have you ever had to pay a babysitter extra money in order to persuade them to watch your child?

*And once you do manage to find a babysitter, does the babysitter seem overly happy and/or relieved when you arrive to pick up your child? (Note: If you don’t get a positive report from the babysitter, then something terrible happened.)

*Does the facial expression below look too familiar? Does your child wear this facial expression at least twice a day?


If you answered “yes” to any of these questions, then I’m sorry to inform you that your child is the dreaded “other people’s kid.”

If you answered “no” to all of these questions (or don’t have any kids of your own), then you might enjoy this: http://www.amazon.com/I-Hate-Other-Peoples-Kids/dp/1416909885/ref=pd_bbs_sr_1/102-8546345-4013714?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1187797707&sr=8-1


~ by jdfodio on August 22, 2007.

One Response to “Other People’s Kids (aka OPKs)”

  1. Yeah, it seems that the most important skill you develop as a young parent is selective deafness.

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